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John Lawler: News/Journal

Buy my new album, 'John Lawler', here: - June 25, 2017

Oh Suzanna, Folsom Prison - October 20, 2013

John Lawler and Lance Brown put a new spin on a couple of old tunes.

Oh Suzanna
Folsom Prison

End Of Days - May 13, 2013

It's 5/13/13 today! Can you imagine how crazy things will get when it's, 13/13/13?

Check out, 'Nuthouse', on Youtube - November 22, 2012

Guitar Evolution - April 18, 2012

Check out John Lawler and Lance Brown in our demo video for a performance we're working on entitled, 'Guitar Evolution'

'Walking Dead' - March 19, 2012

I wish the people on, 'Walking Dead', would stop killing Zombies. Hey, here's a novel idea, Mr. Gun-toting-bow-and-arrow Guy. Have you ever tried just talking to the Zombies?

What do Protestants, Anglicans and Roman Catholics, all have in common? - March 5, 2012

They all roll their eyes when an Episcopalian enters the room.

PC - November 21, 2011

Protestants start drinking before they meet Jesus. Catholics start drinking after they meet Him.

Thought for the Day! - August 9, 2011

Thanks to the Internet and Kindle, the position of, 'Scholar', has been made obsolete.

Happy Star Wars Day! - May 4, 2011

May the 4rth be with you!

Episcopal Church - October 13, 2010

In the Episcopal Church, we put the clowns in charge. Similar to the Democrats.

Went to Roman Catholic Mass This Morning - October 5, 2010

I knew I was in the right place when during the consecration my head rotated 360 degrees.

Quote of the Day - November 4, 2009

"It's not about you. It's about me educating you."

Tamara G

As Of Today! - September 14, 2009

I have excatly 365 days to enjoy my forties.

How did that happen?

Las Vegas - May 29, 2009

I added a few fun pics from my Las Vegas gig with Damian Williams at the, Palms Hotel, on May 8th.

A wonderful group of gals hired us for a surprise birthday party for their friend, Rhonda Mona.

It was a great time. Yikes, is all I can say.

Click on, 'Photos', and scroll down to the bottom of the page.


Cactus Enima - February 17, 2009

This is how my attorney friend JP refers to Obama's stimulus bill.

I thought it had a nice ring to it.

Happy New Year! - January 13, 2009

Hope it's awesome!

The Kremona Orpheus - September 10, 2008

I just bought a new guitar. It's a Bulgarian Kremona Orpheus, Sofia model. All my other guitars are saying, "Who's the new Hot! German chick?"

My Leo Kottke twelve string is saying, "I'm a Leo Kottke Model!"

Sofia says, "Never heard of him."

My Joe Pass hollow body is saying, "I'm a Joe Pass Model jazz guitar."

Sofia says, "Never heard of him."

My Martin J40 six string is retarded. Mainly because of the multiple frontal lobotomies I've performed on him over the years. He just walks up to Sofia and says, "I like popcorn!"

Way of Man - August 15, 2008

John Lawler will be performing the opening set for, 'Way of Man', at 'The Underground Lounge', this Saturday night from 9-10pm.

Click 'Calendar' for more info.

Not Cool - August 12, 2008

Here are some indicators that you are no longer cool.

You tell a really funny joke and everyone in the room says, "Why is that old man talking to himself?"

AA puts you on their, 'Do Not Admit', list.

You go to a 3D movie by yourself because you, "want to see how the technology has changed".

Your last facelift makes you look like you're possessed by a demon.

All you want to talk about are Richard Dryfuss movies.

All of your knowledge comes from infomercials.

Really pretty girls only look at you if you've been run over by a car. Then they say, "Someone should call 911!"

This is What I Hope Heaven is Like - June 5, 2008

I get to be the guy in the blue jacket.

Save the Polar Bears - May 16, 2008

It’s May 16th in Chicago and the temperature is a balmy 40 degrees. Correct me if I’m wrong but doesn’t one of the basic tenets of the global warming religion involve something about actual warming? We should just transplant the polar bears to Lake Michigan. We can fit them all with radar collar bombs that will explode their heads if they come within 100 yards of a human being.

We can have a $300 fine for teenagers who intentionally take part in polar bear baiting just to see their heads explode. The kids will refer to this practice as, 'Polar Popping'.

The History of Psychology - May 7, 2008

There's a very unnerving story in the book of Acts 19:13 about a group of seven Jewish exorcists who, not believing in Jesus, invoked His name in the hopes of exorcising a demon from a man possessed. This was a particularly nasty, Linda Blair, type of demon. The lead exorcist stated, "I adjure you by Jesus whom Paul proclaims." (New English Bible)

As far as I know, this was one of the first times in history that psychology was used to cure someone percieved to be mentally ill.

The scary part was the demons response to the statement. "Jesus I acknowledge, and I know Paul, but who are you?"

Can you imagine being the exorcist-in-training quietly saying under your breath to your more experienced elder, "Now, was he suppose to say that?"

Well the demon then flew into a rage sending all seven men running from the house stripped, bloodied and beaten.

I'll bet at the next monthly psychology board meeting some bandaged up guy with his arm in a sling said, "I'd like to motion that we let the Apostles handle all future exorcisims. All those in favor?"

Santa Claus is Coming To Town - April 18, 2008

Only 251 days till Christmas. We're 31.23% there! GO BEARS!

Speaking of The Holy Spirit - February 19, 2008

When I was a kid in 1972, I heard a guitar player named Leo Kottke. His playing took over my entire world. I decided at age 12, that I was to devote myself to learning how to play like this guy (flash-forward, It never happened). I tried to wrap my twelve year old mind around the awesome sounds that Leo could produce on a guitar. I had some skills back then due to my two older brothers, Steve (who started me on guitar) and Dan (who started me on fingerstyle guitar).

Every night when I said my prayers back then, the Holy Echelon, went something like this: God first, then Jesus, and Leo Kottke and The Holy Spirit were tied for third.

Now this was just a concession prize for the Holy Spirit. I knew that God had no tolerance for people who slandered the Holy Spirit, so I figured if I put the Holy Spirit in honorary third place behind Leo Kottke, God would be ok with that.

Many years later I went through something that brought me to my knees. I fell madly in love. Quite madly, mind you. There were things happening in the physical world and there were things happening in my mind. There was no difference between my mind and the physical world. I was in the here and now and I didn't know what to think or do (I finally decided to write music about it, and leave it at that).

Every now and then I find myself thinking. "Dude, I'm totally sorry about that whole third place thing."

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